Saturday, July 31, 2010

the last pages

its funny with me, usually when I read a book, i want to get to the end, the resolution so bad. its a funny idea, but seriously once you get to the last few pages, you start slowing down, because you know the last few pages of this 2oo some odd pages will have a beautiful outcome (well, usually). donald miller points this out actually in the beginning pages of one of his books. i guess the point im trying to make it sometimes i have a problem slowing down, taking time to smell life itself instead of always taking the high way and just hitting the breeze. i think to much, maybe too often and as all of us we are always changing. Im constantly changing maybe 2x faster than other people, thats why, yes i have a big group of people who love me, i have different groups to move around. sometimes it gets frustrating i guess because ill never know who will be around long enough...a part of me doesnt care, another part (the part thats human) does...i dont mean to question you papa but why all the changing? is this all apart of the bigger role im going to be placed around. I already know with all my complexities and build that i will be challenged, i know i will constantly have to get stronger. im so used to the gray area that ive made refuge here. should i have?

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